i oftentimes think i won the parent lottery. that there are regular parents, and then there are my own who seem to be just that much more awesome than the average bear.
and i’ll spare you all of the reasons as to why exactly i feel this way (because we could be here all night) and simply say this: for the past 27 years, they have been unwavering in their support of me and all of my endeavors. and of all of the things a parent could provide his or her child, the encouragement to dream the impossible dream must rank among the best.
but sometimes having the freedom to chase your dreams, having the support to attain the seemingly impossible, is terrifying. while logically it should evoke a sense of empowerment and limitless possibility, somehow instead, it becomes crippling. and i think that’s because when you’re allowed to chase your dreams with reckless (or at least responsible) abandon, suddenly you become very aware of your own humanity. you’re safe behind the word “no,” there’s a safety net in knowing that if you’re never given the opportunity to try, you’ll never have to face the fear of failing.
but then i recently came across this quote by j.k. rowling:
It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not lived at all. In which case, you’ve failed by default (via)
and suddenly trying and failing over never trying at all seemed like the better option. because i’m tired of living cautiously. i certainly don’t live that way in love or in fashion, so why limit myself in every other life realm?
for years i’ve taken my parents’ support for granted, never truly testing its validity with my own radical (but also reasonable) hair-brain schemes. but that’s like not using your free drink at starbuck’s for your birthday, the only person you end up letting down is yourself. if there was a free, no strings attached, gift sitting atop a meticulously polished silver platter, you’d be a fool not to snatch it up for yourself, right?
because if the unconditional support of the parental unit has taught me anything it’s that when other people believe you are capable of achieving the impossible, suddenly, you allow yourself to believe it, too.
so on this not-quite-yet-but-almost dawning of a new year, i’m daring myself to dream bigger. challenging myself to throw even more noodles (think the whole darn batch of spaghetti) against the wall in hopes that one, two, maybe seven? find a comfy spot atop that stucco, and relying on my chromosomal-shared cheerleaders to see me through the journey, come what may.0