i can count the number of times i have been tan in my life on one hand. there was that one time when i enlisted a trusty spray tan booth at my local tanning salon the week before prom to ensure a bronze glow to off-set my baby pink gown, the time i earned it naturally by basking in the glorious rays of the caribbean sun the summer before my freshman year at pepperdine, and then, well, there’s sunday.
if you’re doing the math at home, that means i basically get a tan every ten years. yeah, that sounds about right.
being a natural redhead (i promise, the red is somewhere under here), my skin has always had the propensity to burn rather than tan. when it comes to sunbathing, my shades are limited: it’s either pale or lobster. so in anticipation of spending two weeks in a continent whose current temperatures (see also: triple digits) are going to force me into some tiny pieces of clothing (see also: bikinis), i figured i might as well beat nature to the punch and get some sort of color that wasn’t reminiscent of a crustacean.
if only for the fact that i could look back at pictures and say, well at least i was tan for half of the trip.
anyway, on sunday i got spray tanned in the privacy of my own home in a little pop-up tent that looks kind of like something i used to sleep in at girl scout camp. the whole ordeal took about twenty minutes and i didn’t even smell like that weird tanning smell that everyone complains about when they get spray tanned (it’s reminiscent of stale hairspray). and aside from being just a tad bit paranoid of getting any lingering bronzer residue on my khaki-colored couch and forcing myself to sit on a beach towel before i showered later in the evening, there were no extraordinary precautions that had to be taken to ensure an orange-booty-imprint-free zone.
and as my tan deepened over the course of the evening, i’m not gonna lie, i felt more and more like a bronzed goddess (see photo below, which is, of course, not me). i can see why celebrities do this all the time. not only does having a little hue on your epidermis makes you feel like you’ve been somewhere tropical, but it also totally makes your coffee-stained teeth look whiter. and a $45 spray tan is way cheaper than professional teeth whitening (i know, i’ve looked into it). and the biggest win? this kind of tan doesn’t give you skin cancer which i think is always the ultimate goal in terms of vanity.
anyway, i know better than to let this tan go to my head because let’s be honest, it’ll no doubt fade away in a week’s time. but before that happens, i’m going to enjoy every minute of being bronze. because in my humble opinion, orange is totally the new black.
p.s. my fabulous barre instructor mer also doubles as a traveling airbrusher. she’s the one that bronzed me and she can bronze you, too! visit the bella bronze to go site for more info.0