Toula Portokalos: I woke up with this huge zit this morning.
Ian Miller: Where?
Toula Portokalos: [points to spot on face] There.
Ian Miller: I had a huge zit this morning!
Toula Portokalos: Really? Where?
Ian Miller: [points to his face] Well, it was there, but it’s gone now.
Toula Portokalos: Why?
Ian Miller: I put some Windex on it.
remember how the patriarch in my big fat greek wedding was notorious for solving anyone’s ailments with the household cleaning spray? he swore by its magical and universal powers. i mean, it even cleared up an unfortunate break-out as evidenced by the scene above. well i”ve been taking a page out of gus portokalos’ playbook. except instead of windex, it’s coconut oil.
i know, i know, we already talked about how i’m kookoo for it -jumping on the oil pulling bandwagon as well as using it to clean my hair. but you guys, my obsession for this stuff keeps growing. case in point: on sunday as my parents and i were reclining on the couch after dinner, toppie looked over at me and said, “you look beautiful.” (ironically enough i had just finished taking off my makeup). mom chimed in with a “i know, your skin is glowing.” i blushed. then smiled. i mean, clearly it’s always nice to hear a good old-fashioned compliment, but my reaction was for another reason. i had a new dirty little secret. the reason for my new-found glow? coconut oil.
after my skin had felt a little blah (dry with the occasional break-out), and on the heels of such success with coconut oil in nearly every other aspect of my life, i threw on a thin coconut oil mask on last friday night (cue katy perry song) to remedy my cosmetic situation. i then prayed my skin wouldn’t have some kind of allergic reaction. i left it on for maybe 5-10 minutes and washed it off with a damp washcloth. you guys, the results were amazing. my face felt silky smooth! i decided to do the mask again on saturday night, this time mixing it in with my face wash to create a hybrid cleanser. i woke up sunday morning feeling dewy, glowy, and fabulous. i’ve been smothering my face with the stuff at least once a day ever since.
speaking of skin issues, i’m not sure if i’ve ever admitted this to y’all but i have keratosis pilaris. no i did not just put a spell on you from the harry potter book of magic (doesn’t it kind of sound like that though?). kp is actually a skin condition “that is manifested by the appearance of rough, slightly red, bumps on the skin. it most often appears on the back and outer sides of the arm,” which is my problem zone as well. it’s pretty unnoticeable to the naked eye (if anything it just looks like i accidentally forgot to rub sunscreen on my triceps before heading to the beach), but by touch, it kind of feels like chicken skin. and not that i’m worried about anyone touching the back of my arms at this point in time (“anyone” being a potential manfriend), i’m still pretty self-conscious about it. after going to my dermatologist, she recommended a glycolic acid wash and lotion which i used religiously for about a month before i left for australia.
and i don’t know if i just imagined it or i was so distracted by kangaroos and koalas that i didn’t think about my kp but i swear the redness and small bumps disappeared over my tenure down under. maybe it was the fact that instead of being stuck in sleeves or under the fluorescent lights of my office, my arms were free to be exposed and soak in some vitamin D goodness (another recommended cure for the skin condition is more exposure to the sun), or maybe it was the australian water, or maybe it was, like i said, all in my head, but somehow in returning to the states, and consequently, to my “normal” life, my kp has returned and more aggressively i might add. so at a loss at what to do, i turned to my trusty “windex.” the next time i showered, i coated the back of my arms with a healthy helping of coconut oil. i let it sit there while i shaved my legs and washed it off with a damp cloth before exiting the shower. i assessed my skin the following morning to see if my kp had subsided at all. albeit minor, there appeared to be an improvement. the verdict is still out on its long-time effects, but i’m hopeful that over time the coconut oil method might be just the trick to get these triceps summer (and tank top) ready.
so there you have it, two more reasons to love coconut oil. and further evidence for my case that in terms of my big fat greek wedding references, it has become my version of windex.