if this season of life is teaching me anything, well, it’s teaching me a lot of things now that i come to think about it, but perhaps one of the biggest lessons i’ve gleaned is the concept of my own humanity. this whole reconciliation of not being superwoman and the realization that despite my best efforts, i simply cannot do it all.
and it’s a hard realization, y’all. not because i think i’m worthy of a spandex leotard and cape (isn’t that what superwoman wears?), but because i hate feeling as though i can’t commit myself to everything that intersects my path -and that in not having the time or resources or energy or a combination of all three might result in letting down someone i love.
and the guilt is enough to eat me alive.
but i’ve been reminded lately that there is reprieve in accepting your own limitations. and while you can’t control how many hours there are in a day or days in a week or weeks in a year, you do have the choice of how you allocate your time. to only the things that you know you can give 110%.
so for the first time in a maybe a long time i’m really focusing on quality over quantity. no longer counting my commitments, but making my commitments count. i’ve given my myself permission to use the word “no.” not because the desire isn’t there, but because doing anything half-a$@ed just isn’t my style. i want, and for the other parties involved as well, to know that my yes really means yes. and when i’m in, i’m all in.